By Saint Pope John Paul II
Excerpt from the Address of John Paul II to the members of the Pontifical Council for the Family, June 4, 1999
The theme of fatherhood, which you have chosen for this plenary assembly, refers to the third year of preparation for the Great Jubilee, dedicated precisely to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. It is worth reflecting on this theme, since in today’s family the figure of the father runs the risk of becoming increasingly hidden or even absent. In the light of God’s fatherhood, “from whom every family in heaven and on earth takes its name” (Eph 3:15), human fatherhood and motherhood acquire their full meaning, dignity, and greatness. “Human fatherhood and motherhood, while biologically similar to that of other living beings in nature, contain in an essential and unique way a ‘likeness’ to God, on which the family is founded as a community of human life, as a community of persons united in love (communio personarum)”. (Gratissimam sane, n. 6)
We still hear the living echo of the recent celebration of Pentecost, which moves us to proclaim with hope the affirmation of Saint Paul: “All who are led by the Spirit of God are children of God” (Rom 8:14). Just as the Holy Spirit is the life of the Church (cf. Lumen gentium, n. 7), so too must He be the life of the family, the little domestic church. For every family, He must be the inner principle of vitality and energy, which keeps the flame of conjugal love ever burning in the mutual self-giving of the spouses.
It is the Holy Spirit who leads us to the heavenly Father and causes the confident and joyful prayer to spring from our hearts: “Abba, Father!” (Rom 8:15; Gal 4:6). The Christian family is called to be distinguished by its atmosphere of shared prayer, in which people address God with the freedom of children and call Him by the affectionate name of “Our Father”! May the Holy Spirit help us to discover the face of the Father as the perfect model of fatherhood in the family.
For some time now, the family institution has been suffering repeated attacks. These attacks are all the more dangerous and insidious because they ignore the irreplaceable value of the family founded on marriage. Matters have reached the point of proposing false alternatives to the family and demanding their legislative recognition. But when laws, which should serve the family—a fundamental good for society—turn against it, they acquire an alarming destructive power.
Thus, in some countries there is an attempt to impose on society the so-called “de facto unions,” reinforced by a series of legal effects that erode the very meaning of the family institution. “De facto unions” are characterized by instability and the lack of an irrevocable commitment that gives rise to rights and duties and respects the dignity of man and woman. Instead, legal value is sought for a will that is far removed from any form of definitive bond.
With these premises, how can we expect a truly responsible procreation that is not limited to giving life, but also includes the formation and education that only the family can guarantee in all its dimensions? Provisions of this kind ultimately place the meaning of human fatherhood, of fatherhood in the family, in serious danger. This happens in various ways when families are not well established.
When the Church explains the truth about marriage and the family, she does so not only on the basis of the data of Revelation, but also taking into account the requirements of the natural law, which are at the foundation of the true good of society and its members. In fact, it is important that children be born and grow up in a home where the parents are united in a faithful covenant.
It is quite possible to imagine other forms of relationship and cohabitation between the sexes, but none of them, despite the contrary opinion of some, offers a real legal alternative to marriage, but rather a weakening of it. In the so-called “de facto unions,” we see a more or less serious lack of mutual commitment, a paradoxical desire to maintain the autonomy of one’s own will within a relationship that, in fact, should be relational.
What is lacking in non-marital cohabitation is the confident openness to a future life in common, which love must create and build, and which the law has the specific task of guaranteeing. In other words, it is precisely the law that is lacking, not in its extrinsic dimension as a mere set of norms, but in its most genuine anthropological dimension as a guarantee of human coexistence and its dignity.
Moreover, when “de facto unions” claim the right to adopt, they clearly show their disregard for the well-being of the child and for the minimum conditions that must be ensured for an adequate education. Finally, “de facto unions” between homosexuals are a deplorable distortion of what should be a communion of love and life between a man and a woman in a mutual self-giving open to life.
Today, especially in the wealthier nations, there is a widespread fear of being parents, coupled with a disregard for the right of children to be conceived within the context of a total human self-giving, which is an indispensable requirement for their peaceful and harmonious growth.
Thus, a supposed right to fatherhood or motherhood at any cost is asserted, and its exercise is sought through technical means that involve a series of morally illicit manipulations.
Another feature of the cultural context in which we live is the tendency of many parents to renounce their role in order to be merely friends to their children, refraining from warning and correcting them even when this is necessary to teach them the truth, albeit with all affection and tenderness. Therefore, it must be emphasized that the education of children is a sacred duty and a shared task of the parents, both father and mother: it requires affection, closeness, dialogue, and example. In the home, parents are called to represent the good Father in heaven, the only perfect model to be inspired by.
Fatherhood and motherhood, by the will of God Himself, intimately share in His creative power and, consequently, have an intrinsic reciprocal relationship. On this subject, I wrote in the Letter to Families: “Motherhood necessarily implies fatherhood, and in turn fatherhood necessarily implies motherhood. This is the result of the duality granted by the Creator to human beings ‘from the beginning’”. (Gratissimam sane, n. 7)
This is another reason why the relationship between man and woman is the cornerstone of social relations: while being the source of new human beings, it closely unites husband and wife, who have become one flesh, to each other and, through them, to their respective families.
Dear brothers and sisters, in thanking you for your dedication in defending the family and its rights, I assure you of my constant remembrance in my prayers. May God make fruitful the efforts of all those who, throughout the world, are dedicated to this cause. May He help the family, bulwark and defense of humanity itself, to resist every attack.
About the author
Saint Pope John Paul II, born Karol Józef Wojtyła on May 18, 1920, in Wadowice, Poland, was elected to the pontificate on October 16, 1978. Pope Francis raised him to the altars of sainthood on April 27, 2014.